Office Work and Fighting Ghoulies

Tags

Gomorrah, Grey, Pearl Grey, Photos, RolePlay, roleplay, Second Life, Victorian

Pearl in Victorian London, looking at the previous apothecary shop.

I got to play today. First stop was Legacies 1891, where Pearl  had some office correspondence to take care of. Her employer owns a lot of property and someone else really wants the now abandoned shop for her bookstore. Pearl got that moving forward and also put an ad in the Gazette for a housekeeper.

Grey fighting a ghoul in the cyber-punk/grunge Sim, Gomorrah

Then it was switching appearance to enter the cyber-punk/grunge Gomorrah Sim where Grey went ghoul hunting. She was using a knife, when a friend came up with  a sub-machine gun to dispatch the rest. Feeling envious, she asked about the weapon.

And what happened next was that the other player, being way more experienced with the cyber stuff, showed me the best stores for shopping. First we looked at weapons, then outfits and then shoes. I landmarked the shops for when I have time to decide what will work for me.

I see that I have more to learn about photography and lightening these pictures up but at the moment I’m pleased that I’ve posted every day this month! Thanks for stopping by.

Too Weird to Play Today

Tags

blogging, choices, Consciousness, life

It’s evening and I just finished reading some awesome WordPress blogs. Mostly from what’s piled up in my e-mail inbox. Usually I pick a block of time to read other blogs, and not on a daily basis.  See, I’m new to blogging and when I look at what others are doing I have do some encouraging self-talk when I forget to not compare.

I’m especially thrilled to find one that is about a roleplay SIM in Second Life, which I’m now following. Another find is a blog about helping Veterans with PTSD. Healing and transforming trauma and the past is a subject dear to me and a part of the focus of this blog in an odd sort of way.

I was planning on roleplaying in the Winterfell (7k) sim today. My character, Wren, needs to get a job! But this has been one of the weirdest days I’ve had in a long, long time. One weird thing after another. It got to where I was hesitant about making very simple decisions.

I’ve been so focused on making good choices, changing habits and tweaking things in the direction of transformation that it was kind of like the universe was laughing at me, my plans and the organization, productivity and accomplishments during the past few days.  Or like that old joke about making God laugh by submitting your five year plan.

Anyway, when I consider quantumness, it seems to me that focus, thoughts, intentions and attitudes shift things around in my life and that’s what happened today. I kept running into people from my past, meeting new people that I didn’t know I needed to meet and had my agenda changed repeatedly. All I could do was relax and roll with it. So when it came time to play online I decided to pass. Instead of attempting to escape into the game, I’ll fix some comfort food, have a soak in the tub, Maybe watch a BBC DVD and center myself more.

I’m wondering what some of your fixes are when you have days like this.

Pearl Hires an Herbalist and Apothecary Assistant

Tags

life, Pearl Grey, RolePlay, roleplay, Second Life

My roleplay experience this evening was quite enjoyable and I had no expectations when I logged on for it. Actually I was tired and annoyed when I first went online and figured I’d check all the messages that had piled up since Sunday and then leave to take a nap.

Running errands most of the day and also shopping for a lightweight daypack for my hikes along the river left me out of sorts from talking to clerks getting paid to serve.  I was hungry, spacey and my back hurt.

And sometimes life surprises us. In the Victorian sim, I’d been placing an ad in the London Gazette for weeks for an herbalist and also a housekeeper for the various businesses and homes that my employer has.  Today, right away someone came in and showed interest for the Apothecary/Herbalist position. The female character is educated, upper class, well traveled and well mannered. She’s intelligent and quite gracious to talk to and agreed to the terms of employment. My character Pearl, gave her a tour and divulged what’s likely too much information for safety. So naturally I’m wondering what evil plot she has planned. She didn’t flash any fangs during the interview.

And speaking of fangs, it sounds like some of the Vampires are venturing into TornOak which is in constant daylight. Pearl has a home there, a refuge from the constant annoying, whining selfishness of Vampires. There aren’t even locks on the doors of our houses.  It won’t be pretty the day I’m doing something online and my avatar is sitting in her rose cottage with plush Victorian furniture and some idiot Vampire who really shouldn’t be able to survive in broad daylight wanders into my home.

But in the meantime, someone has been hired to assist in our Apothecary and in real life I did find a suitable daypack which I will use tomorrow morning. And I hope your day was accomplished and enjoyable as well.

Not Really About Me

Tags

awareness, behavior, choices, life

We live in fast-changing, interesting times and sometimes people go silent. It’s happened to me many time with my roleplaying buddies online. All of a sudden the conversation comes to a stop. I used to wonder what I’d done wrong. Later, I’d often learn there was some other reason that had nothing to do with me. Often, they’ll carry on later as though there was no mysterious break in the communication at all.

I try to give people the benefit of the doubt and hope they’ll do the same with me. But I’ve quit asking what’s wrong. If there’s something they need me to know, they can address it. In the meantime I can only hope that all is well for them.

I haven’t logged into Second Life since Sunday because I’ve been doing other things and it really hasn’t anything much to do with what anyone’s said or done. Or even their breath. I’ve been using my time doing more hiking early in the mornings and then playing catch-up the rest of the day. Resting when I came back around noon today, I read more in the book, Game of Thrones. It’s a great story but I wish the characters weren’t so…..mean and harsh.

Many of us are under a lot of stress and when people act kind of weird I now tend to think it’s something else going on with them. Maybe something they can’t easily talk about. Patience helps, as well as giving people some space and not making whatever it is about me.

My Real Creative Power

Tags

awareness, Consciousness, creativity, life, values

Sometimes creativity is a messy, physical struggle.

My brain is an organ in my head which seems to run in habitual ways, following conclusions I made as a young child while I was soaking up programming not of my choosing. Willpower usually gives way to the unconscious programming.

The mind can be rewired by using the correct tools, which are different for different people if they’re interested. Chemicals have an effect too.

But the real transformational power is in my DNA. An informational organizing system waiting for direction. It’s why my attention and intention is so very important.

The cells are always receiving energy and communicating information about whatever it is I’m focused on or engaged with.

Yes, really.

 

Creativity, Common Sense and a Tarot Reading

Tags

choices, creativity, learning, life

Yesterday morning when I was logged into Second Life I had a quickie Tarot reading regarding the three roleplay sims that I’m engaged in and their relationship to the real life creativity projects that I’m so afraid to begin practicing. I’ve had two previous readings with this inworld Dragon avatar and so knew the drill and that it would likely be accurate.

I remember the good ole days when I could get some kind of divination reading and learn some amazing information that I hadn’t been aware of. Those days are gone, in these times of no gurus, self-authority and being very, very responsible. Even if I had the extra cash for something like that now, the insights would be  inaccurate or would be something I already kind of knew.

Such was the case with this inquiry. I respect the Tarot; the Dragon shuffled the cards and gave me a “long-story-short” reading. I’m spreading myself too thin with the three different characters. If I go any further with them, I’ll get stuck and it will be very difficult to get the real life creative projects started up unless I do so now. It was suggested that I focus 100% on the newest roleplay character, which would have the most chance of improving and drop all the crap. Also, to leave myself an out in case the Admins got big heads.

Did any of this surprise me at all? Absolutely not. Is it common sense too? Yes. Am I going to follow it? Ummm….no. Or at least not totally. I do have some arguments about that which I won’t go into here. Previous advice about how messed up one of the sims is went unheeded even though it was very astute. I can’t say I regret it although much time was wasted.

I will spend less time in Second Life for awhile. In fact I won’t log in again until Thursday. The stories I’m in aren’t the sole reason for this blog, though. It’s really about transformation and rewiring my operating system using the roleplay as a discovery tool instead of going out into the fray of the real world so much. And believe me, I deal plenty with the real world. There are many kinds of people and situations I avoid now just for sheer survival reasons. But this blog isn’t about all that.

I have a commitment I need to honor this week and then beginning in July, next Sunday, I intend to step up the real life creativity practice. No matter how messy, how awful I feel and how totally awkward I am. That’s how it’s been so many times before.

Keeping in mind that I don’t want this blog to turn into a big mess of all the things that I get distracted with, I intend to stay with the original premise for quite sometime, even though I haven’t been able to clearly explain what that is. I’ve marked my calendar and I’ll look at this again in three months to see if I’ve quit two of the roleplay sims, if I’ve regretted my choices and what I’ve learned. But I do intend to tweak my schedule a bit and be more efficient with it all. And continue to make if fun.

My Roleplay Office

Tags

Pearl Grey, Photos, RolePlay, Second Life, Victorian

Crystal Ball Readings in Dark Victorian London

The Legacies 1891 Sim had a Midsummer Fair this afternoon and I had a booth. Mostly I did real life chores and checked the local chat from time to time. There was a beauty pageant and boxing matches and the residents were unusually civil.  I’m tired as though I’ve actually worked!

Wren in the North

Tags

Game of Thrones, Photos, photos, roleplay, Wren Alcyone

Wren arriving in the North

No Plan D for Values

Tags

choices, Consciousness, learning, values

Sometimes I ease into my day and sometimes I hit the ground running. Usually I know what to do but don’t force any order.  With logistics and lack of being in sync with the world around me, things usually don’t work out as planned and I’m learning to stress about that less. Going from Plan B to C to D or giving up for another day simply happens.

Today I had trouble deciding where to go for lunch. Usually I make lunch at home and nothing stood out as a better choice. Call me crazy but I think there’s something in restaurant food that makes me crave it after I’ve had a meal a few times. On the other hand, I don’t like to go to the same environment repeatedly so I was waffling. Where to go?

A week from now it won’t matter so I chose one place and then chose to consider it the right choice and leave it at that. Even if it would have turned out to be a crappy experience.

Sometime within the last decade I gained clarity on my true values and I wonder if other people have such clarity. I’m not talking about what they’ve been taught their values SHOULD be. SHOULDS don’t work so well in my experience.  When I need to make a move and find that logic or hunches or raised vibrations don’t assist me in the choice, knowing my values really helps. Some of my values are seemingly in conflict with each other and so I can go with what seems more important at the time. I don’t have to work hard at remembering them; I’m just somehow aware of them. There are six; that’s the natural number that showed up and they’re in pairs of two. It works for me, until it doesn’t.

I guess one of them should be family, but it isn’t. It isn’t just because my family’s all gone either. Many people just have families that don’t work no matter what they do or how hard they try. Fame and Fortune? Nope.

Freedom and Time. Most people couldn’t really argue with that I guess. Another pair–Comfort and Security. To some, that might be frowned upon but I believe it has to do with my history in this life. Comfort and Security mean different things to different people; I know Security is a perception and is subjective. I’ve often lived without it. In fact I’m quite graceful when living without it but am aware that as a balancing sort of thing for this life, I really do value Security as well as Comfort.

As you might expect, my desire for Freedom and Security is sometimes in conflict and usually Freedom is the priority with me. Time and Security could go either way.

The other two values are Consciousness and Creativity. No matter how awful and  bleak things can get, if I’m aware of my Creativity in action I feel alive and that things will work out. I wondered about Consciousness. Instead of happiness or joy? Peace? But the more I learn to cultivate happiness, joy and peace within, the more I value the intelligence and full spectrum of awareness that is Consciousness.

So that’s it. When I try to compromise these values….well I can’t really bear to. It feels horridly wrong. I’d really love to read what you value and any thoughts you might be willing to share about them.

A Blog Unlike Any Other

Tags

blogging, Consciousness, learning

Nine days and nine posts done. It’s Sunday and I’d planned a block of time to check out the blogs of those who’ve ‘liked’ some of my posts and of those who’ve clicked the ‘follow’ button.

I’ve been enjoying writing everyday and wanted to give myself a solid week of blogging before looking at what others are doing. Yeah, I know we aren’t supposed to compare and that everyone has a unique perception and individual voice. But still.

Yes, I encountered amazing creativity, heart felt compassion and friendly, upbeat  writing styles. I’m guessing some of my categories are what led them to find my posts. Perhaps some random surfing. Yes, I’m intimidated but not enough to stop.

The amazing blogs include photos or artwork, just like I read about in the blogging tips that wordpress sends me. Well I can’t find my camera and there’s something messed up with my scanner. If I used stock photos I wouldn’t have time to write. It seems like I’m slow at everything I do.

With e-mail newsletters piling up in my inboxes already, I see I need to have the next blogs I choose to follow land there as well….the ‘reader’ seems too likely to be overlooked by me if I add any more there.  Maybe I can continue to set aside a block of time every week to catch up on my reading. It might work better for me to keep focusing on my own voice during the week because I can be very influenced by the voices of others.

Internet headlines make it sound like everything’s going to hell or has gone already. The bizarre actings-out and fun house mirrors of our society are in our faces daily. Reading some of the other blogs here reminds me that there are many, many inspiring, courageous, funny and intelligent fellow humans and that all will be well, if perhaps in a messy way of getting there.

People can be saying the same basic message but with their own style and lens and there’s always room for another person getting the good words and visions out, even if at times it seems no one’s paying attention.

I admire the bloggers who took a stand to make an ‘about me’ page…..I’m not there yet. And oh my, so many different themes and templates here. What a lovely place has been created for us to play in.

My theme was rather new when I began this about a week ago and I chose rather quickly. I like the chateau picture at the top. I grew up in a house that was set on cinder blocks. Everything shook when you walked across the room and sometimes animals would get under the house and cause a ruckus.  There were small gas heaters that didn’t really keep the house warm and there was no indoor plumbing. I have always lived in America.

Books weren’t valued in our home and I think I had about two books of my own. One was about Abraham Lincoln.  No, I’m not going to tell my age. What I will say is that I treasure the peace and ambiance in my small apartment. I treasure that I can connect with others on the internet even though many choose to use it in ways that I wouldn’t. The photo of the chateau at the top of my blog is just fine for my purpose here…after all the name of this little endeavor is called Million Happy Endings.